


Morningside

by colormyworldbright



Category: Lovely Little Losers, Nothing Much to Do
Genre: (at least now it is), AU, Drabbles, F/M, Song Lyrics, beadick, sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-08
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-16 20:59:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3502556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colormyworldbright/pseuds/colormyworldbright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on the Lyrics of Morningside by Sara Bareilles<br/>Drabble chapters with the lyrics forming a storyline (that may be out of order). Some chapters may be a bit AU or not completely realistic. <br/>Lots of Beadick.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1: I'm not scared of you now

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not scared of you now  
> Or so I say  
> There's no reason to run  
> Although I may

She hadn’t seen Benedick since the last holidays. She hadn’t even thought of him since she left. She hadn’t reminisced the countless debates they had before it got weird. She hadn’t found herself recalling the way his eyes lit up or his ~~adorable~~ irritating smirk. She hadn’t randomly heard his English accent in her head. She hadn’t wondered what he was up to. She hadn’t pondered what he was thinking of.  And Beatrice Duke most certainly hadn’t periodically thought back to what he had said before she left.

She didn’t care about the dickface enough to do any of those things.

 

* * *

                                                                                            

“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Hero made a last attempt to drag her cousin along with her to the movies, “Pedro will be there and so will Meg and Balthazar and Ursula. Oh and Ben too!”

Beatrice made disgusted face at the mention of Ben. She shuddered, “Ugh yeah I’m sure I don’t want to go.”

“Why have you gone out of your way to avoid Ben?” Her thirteen year old cousin asked.

“I have not gone out of my way to avoid Dickface,” She replied defensively.

Hero cringed at the nickname.

“But you didn’t want to come with me to the beach last week when he was there but you were okay yesterday when he wasn’t. You said no to going to Pedro’s house a few days ago even though you love hanging out with him and his mum made those cookies you adore because, I assume, Ben was there.” She tried to reason, “You are totally avoiding him.”

Beatrice turned her attention back to the television and replied nonchalantly, “I just hate him and I don’t want to be around him.”

“So you are avoiding him.” Hero concluded.

“I am choosing to not be in the company of someone I dislike.” Bea clarified indignantly.

Hero sighed, “What happened? I thought you were friends.”

The fifteen year old laughed, “Nope.”

“I admire you for avoiding him then. It’s better than arguing with him and being mean to him all the time. It’s really noble” Her cousin smiled.

Then she frowned, “But then again you haven’t spoken a single word to his face. You haven’t even looked at him. That’s either immense self-control or—“

“Or what?” Bea countered, “I am not avoiding him. I don’t avoid people. I do however stay away from people I hate. That’s it."

Hero nodded, accepting that her cousin did not want to discuss the other possibilities.

“Okay then, I’m going to go. I’ll bring you back some popcorn, yeah?” Hero said lastly, hugging her cousin goodbye.

“Mhm, enjoy the movie.” Bea answered, glad that she didn’t have to justify herself any longer.

But she found that she was still justifying herself when Hero left.

There was this nagging feeling inside of her. _You are avoiding him. You’re afraid of him. You can’t help but run away._

No. No. No.

Beatrice Duke was not afraid of anything. And there was no reason for her to run away from Ben. He meant nothing to her. Nothing at all. Not being in his presence was just better than having to be around him for everyone. She didn’t have to be around him if she didn’t want to be. Everyone has the right to do what they want. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm not as sure as I seem  
> This much I know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place sort of before the last one. I guess it can be a stand alone. Hope you enjoy :)

Benedick Hobbes. The name made the average Messina High School student think: new kid—annoying, whiny, cocky, and argumentative. Assuming of course that the average Messina High student knew who he was. Perhaps they wouldn’t have said that much about him. They could definitely tell you he was “self-assured” if you asked though. That loud, know-it-all was definitely confident.

At least, he seemed that way. And really, appearances are all that matter. What you see is your reality, anyway.

Except they aren’t.

Because just because someone seems self-assured, acts all confident, doesn’t mean that they are.

He sure isn’t.

How could he be?

His parents’ unfortunate taste in names started it.

He doesn’t blame them or anything, but come on did they really think no one would laugh at him? Well maybe it isn’t only his name. He’s annoying—too loud and eager. He is an only child. (Not that that counts as an excuse.) And he wants to fit in so badly. He really does. So of course the kids do what kids always do.

They chew him up and spit him back out. A mushy unstable version of his first self.  

He learns early on that if you’re funny and interesting, they aren’t as mean as they could be. Not that he isn’t funny and interesting naturally of course. He just—He feels like he needed to be. Because once you stop being funny and interesting you’re not their friend anymore. You just aren’t.

Anyway, of course he’s a bit eager to please when he moves to New Zealand. Of course he clings even more so to the idea of a friend.

And he does make friends.

Pedro is nice. All around great guy. He puts up with Ben for longer than most people have. He’s a cool person. Everyone’s friend.

Beatrice is better. She’s smart and funny and for once he feels like someone gets him. His need to talk for hours. His love of Doctor Who and Harry Potter. His fascination with life. ~~She’s really pretty too.~~

He’s never believed in relationships. Neither has she. Relationships are stupid. If friendships rarely last then relationships sure don’t. His mind understands that. But apparently his heart doesn’t.

BumBum-BumBum-BumBum. Faster and faster _whenever she’s around_. And there’s this feeling inside of him _whenever she’s around_.

He doesn’t like her. He _doesn’t_ like her.

He doesn’t believe in that stuff. _And neither does she_. She’d never like him. Not like that. Girls don’t like obnoxious, insecure little nerds. Especially not girls like her. Not that it matters. He doesn’t like her. He doesn’t feel anything at all.

“Friendships are like butterflies: they die in three days.” He says it to remind himself.

“Relationships are stupid.” He has to say it again and again. Why won’t his stupid heart get it?

It takes it a while. Then she starts being mean. And ignoring him. And calling him a dick—just like _they_ used to. And it has to listen.

He was right.

So he clings to Pedro. Then he clings to Claudio.

He doesn’t need her.

But he does need someone. Anyone.

He’s not sure of himself. How could he be?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment or give kudos if you liked it :)


	3. Chapter 3: What does it mean when you leave?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What does it mean when you leave   
> And I follow

She doesn’t know why—

It’s incredibly irritating—

She tried so hard to just ignore—

It worked—

But—

No she isn’t—

She doesn’t—

…But she does.

She can’t help it.

They have an argument. And she just can’t let it go. She has to follow him. Let him know exactly what part of his logic is messed up. Crush his argument ~~(like he crushed her heart)~~. And its—well, she wouldn’t admit it to anyone (she rarely admits things you know…) but—it’s fun.

She misses talking to him.

But that’s just because..no one else wants to debate. No one else can debate.

And he just..well he tries to up and leave as soon as he thinks he’s won—idiot. She has to follow him and let him know why he lost.

Obviously. It doesn’t mean anything.

..maybe she should stop..It’s not like he’s tried to keep up the arguments.

He “lives in the now” anyway. Once “the now” isn’t the argument he leaves.

She doesn’t need to follow.

She just does.

There’s nothing wrong with proving you’re right.

And so what if that one time she actually walked him all the way home trying to explain why flamingos are NOT “majestic creatures.”

That wasn't going a bit too far.

And Hero is way, way off. She didn’t continue the conversation because she wanted to spend more time with dickface. She continued it because she had to be right. She was right.


	4. Chapter 4: I could try to forget what you do when I let you get through to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I could try to forget what you do when i let you get  
> Through to me but then you do it over again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is a bit AU. I hope you like it.

He would never admit it, but there are times when he remembers why they were friends. There are times when she says something or does something that makes him reminisce. And then there are the times when he forgets that she doesn’t consider them friends.  

Like when she tutored him in for that physics quiz.

Or the time when she agreed with him on the cultural significance of Doctor Who.

It’s like they click again. (Like they’re fourteen again.)

But those moments go as fast as they come.

And they’re never mentioned again.

Like the time when they were up at school past hours.

“What are you still doing here?”

He could recognize her voice everywhere.

Beatrice.

“I could ask you the same.” He replied, not answering.

“I had to make up a test from when I was sick last week and then I volunteered to help Mrs. Gibbs clean out her supply closet and I lost track of time.” She explained, putting her backpack down and sitting next to him.

She looked at him expectantly, “So why are _you_ here?”

He shrugged. He wasn’t going to tell her. She’d find it stupid for sure. She’d judge him for it. She’d make fun of him for it. It would be pointless.

“Seriously,” She said after a few silent seconds have past, “Only the nerds are still up here. School ended ages ago. And what’s with this side of the building.”

He decided impulsively to tell her, “It’s stupid, but I wanted to see what the school was like when no one was there. You know? See it silent.”

Surprisingly, she doesn’t burst out laughing, “Like would it still feel the same without everyone there?”

He nodded.

“Well it’ll just feel boring if you stay here.” She commented.

He’d already told her enough, why not the whole plan, “That wasn’t my plan.”

He pointed to the custodian’s closet to their left, “I’ve noticed she always leaves her door open. And that she leaves her keys in there.”

Her eyes widened as she realized what he’s planned.

“That’s actually brilliant, Ben.” She decided. She always calls him Ben during these …moments(?).

“So you better let me come with you.”

He was almost shocked, but it was Beatrice. She always surprised him. (Two years ignoring him. One year constantly trying to rip him to shreds then being oddly friendly.)

So, he said as calmly as she, “Sure.”

They worked on homework for a bit. Separately. Just waiting for the custodian to “lock up” and go home.

As soon as he was out the door they were in it.

Bea grabbed the keys, “I pick first.”

He argued that it was his idea. They fought over the keys. They almost lost the keys. They decided to stop squabbling. (Okay, fine, she overpowered him.)

Her place of choice was the library. He was surprised the janitor had a key to the library.

It was dark. At least until the automatic lights lit up the never ending bookshelves.

She smiled. ~~She looked so pretty right then.~~

“It’s like. It should feel the same, because it’s always quiet, but it doesn’t.”

“No desperation in the air. No annoying librarian telling you to shush.’ He added.

They stood in silence for a few ticks. Then he grabbed the keychain right from her hands and when she protested said defiantly, “My turn.”

He wanted to go to an empty classroom.

She then chose the drama room.

And it went on.

Until it was actually dark out.

Bea suddenly panicked, “Oh shit. I forgot that my phone died. Hero must have texted me a hundred times.”

He wanted to offer her a ride home, but he knew that that’s against the unspoken contract.

So he drove home, thinking about how just last week they’d gotten into their worst ever fight and he’d sworn to never speak to her again.

He tries to forget the afternoon at the school. (She sure has.)

But he can’t.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this.


End file.
